Love ??

Love ??

(This article has been read 45 times)

Posted by browneyes on July 06, 2003 (Sunday)

These are just rambling thoughts on a very controversial topic. I am sure many of you would disagree but then pls take it as one of the many truths possible

Love is too strong a word for me�.. at times. Concepts like these even if once experienced can not be put down in words. Its like experience itself, you can only go through it���. But like experience, all one typically does when one loves someone is learn��.

What one learns could be anything, and that�s the beauty of it all. For the relationship oriented social world that we live in and survive is because there is in abundance the concept of love.

Love if often a misnomer. It is referred for what a mother feels for her child or what a child feels for his parents or what a close cousin or a sibling cares about. It could be what your best friend�s devotion to you and the faith your grandparents have in you. So many verbs, nouns are there for it.

In most literature, and in life, love is often construed as what a man feels for a woman and vice versa, the logical conclusion of which is living together, which with social sanction and agreement is called marriage. But what is considered pure love is what the couple feel when they meet to the time, when they finally acknowledge that they love each other. To themselves or to each other.

Let us try and see if we can understand what in this entire process is called love. �Love at first sight� is a phrase which is oft repeated as the desired state of existence. Who ever coined that phrase has left the rest of humanity with an enigma. I saw her, She saw me, and we both knew�����.. I have heard so many of these tales, and all them never fail to excite our imaginations and desires. The thought that we don�t have to make an effort to get a perfect sync with the person we would be staying the life with is the best anyone could ask for.

But, what happens during that time � the smile, the blush, the tear wiped off the cheek, the shoulder given to cry, the laughter at one�s jokes, the innuendoes and the fact that the person is there seems enough for life to be lived. Why does this often fall apart then. With all the beauty and art which is displayed, why, especially in west, does love flourish and die quickly. Maybe it is in the word art � When one begins to start a painting, one is really engrossed in the painting. A touch of brush here, a dab of colour there and the process is ever rewarding, ever enriching and a wonderful experience. The satisfaction of creating a work which can replicate a part of life in anywhich way in itself immense. However, with that process over, and the entire painting on the canvas with all its minute details taken care of, we are left with no desire to watch it. We don�t keep on watching it every time, or even take care of it. The beauty and the art was in the process of creating it and when you reach the endpoint, where you are not creating each other, that would seem like the end of involvement. And so does probably happen in love. When all the nuances of the other person are known and all the jokes laughed upon and all the assurances given, one does not feel any compelling reason to feel elated.

The only way to counter this is probably the evolution of relationships. Interestingly, all blood relations do go through this evolution. From baby to adoloscence to teen to a grown up. Each stage represents a different power structure, priorities, issues and likes or dislikes. However, a relationship of love may not get a chance to evolved. Why is it that marriage brings greater stability to relationships ? Why is it that in east, where arranged marriages last longer than the average love marriage in west ? The solution probably lies in evolution. The knowing each other and finding about each other stage would be in early marriage, which evolve to a bit of comfort plus a feeling of infringement of private space. However, you grow over it with greater and yet greater familiarity. And then the child brings the discontinuity. Suddenly, you are no longer a husband-wife, but a mother-father too. And this is a complete change of the relationship you had. With each stage of the kid, the relationship of the parents evolve and many a times, even in broken marriages, kids keep the parents together till they reconcile due to their relationship with the kid. But what happens, when the kid gets married and is off to begin his new life. With his own spouse and kids. Yes, the grandchild does bring about excitement, but by then a couple of generations have passed and experience is richer. Many a couple then get to the end of their lives together because they get so used to each other or are highly dependant on each other. Many couples take up hobbies, try and immerse themselves in children�s or grandchildren�s life, but there are couples who just love each other and love each other to the end of their lives.

This is ladies and gentlemen, what I would call true love. Walking hand in hand towards the setting sun on the beach and hearing the beat of the heart you love over the roar of the waves. Feeling the breeze in the air as if every particle of it is getting touched by the skin of your love and that the smell in the air emnates from his or her body. When you think something and close your eyes, your love already knows what you want or what you feel. And you know that he or she knows. And he or she knows that you know that he or she knows���

That is love.