Before and After

Does marriage make romance just vanish... does it make people change... does it make life stagnant and boring... here's a cup of life fer u!

“Remember the day we got married?”, I asked.

My husband looked at me half-interested. He squinted his eyes in the sun. His lips softly sipped coffee and his lap gave shelter to the morning newspaper.

I knew it was a dumb question. What the heck, it could be dumber! I could ask him if he remembered his name, or mine for that matter. But when you’re sitting in the sun for practically an hour with someone you’ve tied up a knot with for the rest of your life, silent and mum, it seems like any question in the world comes genuinely.

“Yea, I do. Why do you ask?”And I must comment, that was a better question.“Just like that. It was so beautiful, wasn’t it?”

He nodded.

And turned to the next page of the newspaper.

“Can I have more coffee?”

Like I’d say no!

I got up silently to refill the coffee mug, half hoping that he would call me back and talk about those good days for endless hours. The other half of course, hoping to dump the coffee on his head and tear his newspaper apart. Men!

My mother in law crossed me, pretending to ignore my very existence. I don’t know what was she mad about. No one knows what she’s mad about. She just makes a bad face and gets back to normal, as per her wishes exclusively. My father in law, well, he’s pretty much the outdoor guy kinds. I don’t remember the last time we all sat together to share a cup of tea. He’s barely around. He’s got tones of associations to keep up to. And he sure does do a hell of a job!

But of course, being the daughter in law of the house, you cannot ignore the very existence of your mother in law. So I retraced my steps back, catching up with her and touching her feet. She mumbled something, that I suppose was a blessing, and continued to walk on towards the lawns. Oh well, a coffee was supposed to be on its way!Gone were the days when the term marriage used to ring wedding bells in one’s ears and make one’s eyes gleam. Gone were those days when the husband used to buy you expensive gifts and take you on strolls every evening. And here come those where marriage means staring at your husband reading the newspaper and making sure you touch your mother in law’s feet.

The coffee didn’t take too long to make, just like it didn’t take too long for my hubby dearest to finish it.

“What’s the latest today?”, I asked timidly.

Maybe the “news” idea will inspire him to talk to me.

“Well today, umm yea okay”.“

”What?“

”Read the newspaper yourself Naina, I am kind of busy“

Great! That’s what I needed! Stagnant married life.

The Sun was shining so bright, it was hurting my eyes, as if telling me, ”get lost, he’s all mine“.

”Ashu, I’m pregnant”.

I don’t think he gave such a start ever. He looked at me half surprised, half terrified. The coffee spilled over his newspaper making the ink blot bad. His mouth opened way too wide, and his handsome face looked completely dumb-stricken.“Naina, are you serious in God’s name?

”I wasn’t even remotely pregnant. But sometimes you have to take drastic measures to get attention.

“No, I am not serious. But I am glad that got your newspaper messed up”, I growled back.He smiled, then laughed. I think the last time I saw him smiling was three days before, when a long lost friend e-mailed him. I don’t get too many smiles from him. So it was like an achievement.

And then looking in all directions before he held my hand, “Lets go for a movie tonight”.

It was time for me to give a start. I was on cloud nine. Of course, a movie! I think if I would’ve smiled any harder my lips would’ve cracked. Anyway, he quickly slipped his hand away as he saw his mother approaching us.

He stood up and bent down to touch her feet. She mumbled something, I was straining to understand what she said, but I bet Ashu couldn’t himself. Then she looked at me, in a strange manner. I smiled at her. She smiled back and turned around and walked off. I wish I knew where. And when I looked around, Ashu was reading the supplement. And I suddenly felt like asking myself if the movie plan was a dream.

The rest of the day passed by at snail’s pace. I was so excited about that night that I could barely keep my feet on the ground. I took half an hour just to decide what to wear. Fond memories of our courtship period tickled my thoughts and my lips were constantly moulded in a bright smile. I called Ashu several times to remind him of our plan and to pick up the tickets on time. God knows why, a man’s memory tends to get so poor with age. He needs to be reminded of basic things time and again, and yet he fails to do them most of the time. Perhaps that’s why a man needs to marry so bad, a wife also serves the purpose of a personal secretary. On the contrary, before a woman becomes his wife, he seems to remember every slightest detail with such fine proximity.

At seven that evening, Ashu returned home. His face was dotted with sweat beads and his eyes screamed for sleep. My heart took pity on his condition and I considered silently of dropping the movie. However, I knew the tickets had been bought and it would really be a waste to cancel the evening. To compensate in advance, I made him a nice drink and watched his adam’s apple bob as he drank it all in a gulp.

He grumbled as he changed his clothes and got into the car. My heart was beating hard, just like the first time we went on a date. The only thing missing was his spirit. It took us almost half hour to reach the theatre and all the way we battled over which music to play in the car stereo. In the end we settled for silence and the only music between us was the constant honking of the cars behind us.

I had put extra effort getting ready that evening. I made sure I was wearing the perfect dress and the perfect make-up to make this evening no less than perfect. Still, at the theatre I was grabbing everyone’s attention except my very own hubby’s. He seemed to be walking in one straight line like a zombie absolutely unaware of anything happening around him.

The movie could’ve been good if Ashu wouldn’t have commented limitlessly on how bad hindi movies really are and constantly asking me to reconsider walking out. Maybe that’s how all men are made — no matter how good something maybe, if a woman enjoys it, it deserves alteration and objection. Before our married life took toll over our lives, we used to see a movie every Friday, and he loved it.

All the way back home, he complained about the traffic and the heat. As soon as we reached home, he rushed to the bedroom and moments later I could hear him snoring softly. I giggled to myself as I saw him sleeping like a baby. Things change so drastically after marriage, don’t they? The joy of being in each other’s company, the excitement of exchanging gifts, the giggles and snickers, the timid pranks, the romantic words “ where did all disappear? Was marriage the end of all mush and romance?

I lay on the bed, turned the light off and closed my eyes. Moments later, his arms wrapped around me and he whispered ” I love you.

Well, maybe things really haven’t changed after all...